Not Evil Enough

Yesterday, Theresa brought over some Bernie Bott's Every Flavor Beans made by Jelly Belly. (If you haven't read Harry Potter, you should be ashamed of yourself. Go read it and come back to this post once you've read it.) Needless to say they had a number of off color flavors like soap, dirt, earthworm (tastes like a mild form of dirt), etc.

In any case, we had fun dumping the lot on the table and sorting them into their different flavors based on the "flavor guide". We ate all of the standard flavors and sampled some of the less offensive exotic flavors. I think Theresa was going to die laughing when she asked me what I had just eaten and she got a luke-warm answer of "earwax".

In the end, we had a pile of "exotic" flavored beans, some of which border on disgusting. I got to thinking, this is a great prank. I've got nasty jelly beans...I know my sister keeps a stash of jelly beans at the office...why don't I mix the two and wait for chaos to ensue.

Here's the problem. I can't do it. I just cant bring myself to do it. I keep thinking of the looks on their faces when they eat a jelly bean that looks like it will taste like coconut but really tastes like sardines and it makes me laugh so hard. And still I can't bring myself to do it. I guess I'm just not evil enough.

PS Sparky's ghost cat has come back and now taunts him. She is evil enough.

Psycho-kitty Deluxe--part 2

So I was in a bit of a halloweeny mood before and thought you might enjoy a bit of creepy goodness along with the weird story of Sparky and his obsession with the cat outside.

Seriously, this cat is a little creepy. It only shows up at night and it is white, fluffy, and makes Sparky go absolutely crazy. It is like he's been given catnip spiked with speed.

There are about six or seven cats that periodically visit Sparky from the neighborhood. One is a mangy cat from Pennsylvania street who braves the busy street to say hello to S. Another is an orange Tabby who is super friendly and loves to make Sparky jealous by asking me to pet him on the way in the back door. Another is a long haired little guy who sits below the side window and stares up at S with the wisdom of an old owl. The white cat is the one that makes S go bonkers. More bonkers even than the squirrel.

Psycho-kitty Deluxe

On Halloween night, about two in the morning, the house is all quiet. I'm dead asleep.

All of the sudden, I hear this pounding from the next room. Loud, aggressive pounding.

Startled, I walk to the next room and see the blinds to the front window are moving. I hear a faint hiss... Sparky is hissing quietly and pawing at the window. He was between the blinds and the window, going berserk at something outside.

Is it a burgler? Is it pumpkin smashers? Is someone digging a grave in my front yard?

I peek outside and a stark white cat is on my front porch. It is teasing Sparky. Watching him... like it is his conscience is outside the door... haunting him... Is this the ghost of a cat Sparky once wronged? Is this his long lost soul mate? Is this the Kitty cat devil or angel?

[to be continued...]